Tuesday, July 13, 2010
Anyone else ever lose their blog?
Hi. I'm back. And everything is going as well as can be expected-except for a couple of hiccups. I lost my blog. Well-Not really-But, I could not figure out how to log in because enough time has passed that, well , I forgot. At least I can laugh now. I consider that progress. I turned 36. And I have been focused on rest and recuperation-for the first time since I got hurt 5 years ago. I decided that,dammit, -I am going to get well. And I really feel a difference. And-drumroll , please, I am consciously allowing myself to look silly by asking questions. Why?Why?Why? Because I need the brain to work. And I have come to realize people are going to understand or not. And I am going to have to deal. And for someone as driven as myself-this is haaaaaaaard. I resent not being able to run the 12 miles I did in field hockey. I resent not being able to keep up the dancing I need to for a show that I could do. I resent not being able to WAITRESS. I LOVED waitressing. I hate being forced to give up any aspect of my life because I am not able to. It's demoralizing.And correcting myself-well-it's EMBARRASSING. Do I really want other people seeing my mistakes? No. But I need to do it in order to correct. Sigh. Still onward.